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Mornin '12
Uros "Vader" Pavlovic
05:15 am EDT @ October 12th, 2012
All hail the Metropolitan Dead Orphan Choir of Dunwall:
What will we do with a drunken whaler? x3
early in the morning
Way-hay and up she rises x3
early in the morning
Stuff him in a sack and throw him over x3
early in the morning
Feed him to the hungry rats for dinner x3
early in the morning
Way-hay and up she rises x3
early in the morning
Shoot him through the heart with a loaded pistol x3
early in the morning
Slice his throat with a rusty cleaver x3
early in the morning
Way-hay and up she rises x3
early in the morning
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How about playing a guy, who just gets one beating after another until the end of the game, in which he dies a horrible, disappointing death and doesn't get to save anyone?
And please don't swear, people will get the feeling you are mad at something.
Or William Boroughs.
Everyone and their grandmother seems to adore the game. But it's not without its flaws.
For one thing, the plot is so cookie-cutter lazy and simplistic I feel vaguely insulted as an audience.
"OBVIOUSLY CORVO KILLED THE EMPRESS, BECAUSE HE'S HOLDING HER BODY. ARREST HIM. AND CONVENIENTLY IGNORE THAT THE PRINCESS HAS BEEN ABDUCTED, CLEARLY PROVING ANOTHER PARTY WAS INVOLVED.
ALSO, CAN SOMEONE EXPLAIN TO ME WHY THE CHIEF ROYAL BODYGUARD IS BEING USED ON DIPLOMATIC MISSIONS THAT REMOVE HIM FROM HIS CHARGE FOR WEEKS? ON WHAT PLANET DOES THIS MAKE SENSE? OH, ON PLANET DUNWALL-TOTALLY-NOT-CITY-17? OKAY."
I'll probably rant a bit more in the review article's comments later on (I have a growing check-list, actually), but for now this venting satisfies my angst.
Don't get me wrong though, I like the game a lot. It's just that I feel like it could be game of the year if not for a plot that seems like it was written on the back of a napkin.