I can't believe this has taken as long as it has. The Russian media has finally done the wonderfully predictable and begun to link that Russian airport scene in Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 with the recent airport suicide bombing. Here's a news story that lays it out straight with this headline: "Terrorist games linked to Russian airport bomb". Yes, I'm sure that is completely accurate.

There's a lot of talk about how terrorists are possibly training with video games, much in the same way that it was claimed that the Columbine shooters, Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold, practiced shooting up their school by playing Doom. Imagine the tremendous carnage the two would have caused if the school hadn't recently gotten rid of its ubiquitous stock of exploding barrels and rocket launchers.

Jared Laughtner, A.K.A. the guy who shot Gabby Giffords at the Safeway I used go to when I had the munchies (fo realz, dawg) played some small website run MMO called Earth Empires, which judging only by the title (I could be completely wrong) doesn't sound like a game that involves shooting a bunch of people in a grocery store parking lot.

Video gamers are the new Satanists for the global media, which is fine with me since I was already a Satanist to begin with. This is a media that would cut off a story about a potential cure for some horrible illness, let's say herpes, with something like live traffic cam footage of a rape in progress, with the news lady saying something like, "Have we identified the victim yet, Steve?" "Why yes we have, it's 88-year-old mother of three, grandmother of eight, Dolores Peterson." "Wow, he's really giving it to her hard, Steve." "Why yes he is, Jolene, yes he is." After the commercial break, the next news segment asserts without a sense of irony that the act of sitting on the couch manipulating a piece of plastic with your thumbs while staring at a screen for hours on end somehow turns people into hardened killers by exposing them to insane scenes of graphic violence. This is followed by something about a pet parade or some other innocuous sounding civic gibberish and topped off with a lovely foray into nitty-gritty details of the latest local series of grisly murders or traffic fatalities.

Video games are still somehow the cause of our woefully violent modern society, not the fact that we're collectively suffering from paranoid delusions and armed to the teeth.