Postal 2 Preview

We've recently caught up with the boys from Running With Scissors and have managed to ask them a few questions about their gory Unreal Warfared FPS, Postal 2, before they were taken back to whatever hellhole they came from. Person detained for this interview was: Mike Jaret-Schachter -- Marketing Moyel. Be advised though, there's plenty of the 'FUCK' word in whatever collection of fonts systematically arranged so that they form coherent sentences is to follow.

Action Trip: So, let me start with the question that's probably on everybody's mind. Why the name "Running With Scissors?" Do you, basically like jogging every morning with scissors? As you move, the scissors start tearing into your flesh and there is blood and guts everwhere... OK, this question doesn't make sense at all, but we'd appreciate an honest answer ;)

Motion captured chick.

I'm the sexiest girl ever taa daa!

Mike Jaret-Schachter: Sick fuck you BE!! No mom and paw always said don't run with scissors and since we make shit that they wouldn't want us to do anyway....might as well run with scissors!

AT: Milk obviously means a lot to you guys. Why?

MJS: It does a body good and chicks need milk!

AT: Basically, what's Postal Dude's main task in the game? Other than to do chin-ups at home dressed as a catholic nun, while drinking sheep blood and listening to Mozart...

MJS: Boning, blowing shit up, shooting the neighbors, kinda like Jim Morrision..."Come on baby light my fire, yeaaahhhhh"

AT: Mixing violence with humor can produce a rather dangerous cocktail. How do you think our troublesome and conservative society will react to it? Do you think they'll shoot you, rape your pets and then shoot them after they're done?

MJS: Hell they can take a crack at raping champ (Vince's dog).....he might just rape them back! And bring the bullets....we got a plethora of back up!

AT: Would you have the balls to throw in the word 'fuck', and show some naked chicks in the game?

MJS: FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!! FUCK YOU ...FUCK THEM.....FUCK EVERYONE!! Hehe.....naked chix....we don't want you beating off while playing our game, you should have a real naked chick playing you!

AT: Recently, you claimed that you're thinking of inventing your own rating system, to correspond with the unique appeal of Postal 2. Do you have any specific ideas for that yet?

MJS: "Screw you for judging me...I am who I am!" That's how we feel about the real ratings system....so you'll see what were thinking lata on!

AT: What are the main similarities between the original Postal game and Postal 2? Do you shoot people? Er, I mean virtual people... in a game that is...

Now this is my idea of a Xmas tree.

Ave!

MJS: The Dude, the weapons, that's madness!!! This will be a twist for the avid postal fan...and it'll be a nice kick in the ass to the avid NON-Postal fan!

AT: The first Postal game had quite a straightforward interface, and everything the player had in his possession was on screen in front of him. Will it be the same in Postal 2? Or can I like carry around a portable nut grinder in my pocket.

MJS: What is this 20 questions.....oh yah.....uh well there will be an interface (GUI) of some sort....POSTAL 2 is much more complex yet extremely simple at the same time, who wants to think when they should be shooting FOO!

AT: Obviously the Unreal engine will make it all happen. One of the most important issues here is conveying the AI routine from the first game and making it work with the Unreal engine. How's that going so far? Why use AI when they'll all wind up dead in the end?

MJS: WRONG.., the Player will make it HAPPEN...or NOT. The AI is the best fuckin part!! To have a guy fuckin cryin like a lil bitch when youre about to kill him...and talk back if you walk away is the funniest fuckin thing in the world! And who says they'll all end up dead.....only psychos will kill everyone!!! :

AT: Speak a little bit about the multiplayer support.

MJS: Pretty awesome multiplayer....we give the legions of nazi like POSTAL fans what they want...an ability to truly make their own cool POSTAL World and we get to watch...now that's satisfaction.

AT: In the end, we have to ask you this. Will Asia Carrera appear in the game (just a thought, we recently found out she's a great Unreal fan, so logically she must like games that are going to utilize its engine)?

MJS: I think she was already in some game...where you ride around on this piece of wood with wheels........Tony Eagle...errr....Crow.......errrr...HAWK!! No porn stars...although she does stop by the office and blow us every few weeks!! But trust me, you'll get a major fuckin' kick out of who's in the game!!