Area 51 Review

One interesting game feature is Ethan's ability to turn into a mutant himself. After he gets infected with the virus, he is allowed to transform into a mutant at will, which makes his melee attacks slightly stronger. His body also becomes more resistant to enemy attacks, and he is granted two long-distance attacks, as well as the ability to highlight hostile targets. In practice, all this isn't that much fun as it may sound, as it fails to introduce more variety into the gameplay. (Why does he get to turn into a mutant at will when everyone else is trapped there? LIES! - Smap)

This is me checking out my teammmate. Yeah... I like what I see.

You want me to go down there? Sorry to disappoint you, but no way in hell!

The level design is solid and relatively varied, even with the fact most puzzles are quite simple and obvious. In case you don't have the habit of actually listening to your mission objectives, a small indicator will inform you about the direction you should be moving in, the location of your objectives, as well as vital mission clues.

As far as the graphics are concerned, the environments in Area 51 are a mixed bag of blessings. There are occasional clipping issues, with dead monsters getting stuck in walls and shit like that. On the other hand, the special effects are rendered very well, both in visual and in audio terms (explosions and such). Although Area 51 is a console port, the graphics do a rather good job most of the time, with the possible exception of monsters who look as if they've been drowned, then soaked in water for weeks on end, and then washed ashore and revived for the sole purpose of sinking their claws (or teeth, doesn't really matter) into you. They are mostly very blurry and low-polygonal, which is something you'll become fully aware of the instant they get close to you.

In any case, the enemies simply look bad, and their voices aren't that great either, consisting mostly of inarticulate low growling noises that you'll probably find very irritating. You know what I'm talking about; the noises your dad usually makes at dinner. Voices of your teammates sound good, bearing slightly more enthusiasm than your own, and the ambient sounds do a fairly good job too. (It's not the lack of enthusiasm as you put it, it's the lack of David's acting skills. Stop sugarcoating it. -Ed.)

All in all, Area 51 is a pretty standard first-person shooter with little if any original content, an unintelligible storyline, and game options typical for the genre, packed with some intense combat and an occasional feel you're actually onto something, while in fact you will only be browsing levels in search for bigger, badder, and meaner opponents. Add to this the fact the game is not that long, and that it doesn't have a great replay value, courtesy of the mediocre multiplayer facet.

What have I learned from this game? (That David Duchovny should be banned from lending voices to video game characters ever again? -Ed.)

You betcha!

Aside from that, I have learned that mediocrity leads to obscurity. You figure that one out, Einstein.